Friday, January 27, 2012

Friday Food Recap.

steel cut oats, organic berries, cinnamon, and pure maple syrup. tea.

chai tea with almond milk. whole grain bread with organic peanut butter, raw honey, and organic bananas.

plums with agave and cinnamon.

pear with honey and nutmeg.

pukka cleanse tea. one of my favs. 

roasted veggies. anything we had in the fridge.

sweet potato and cinnamon.

whole grain bread, fieldroast, organic baby spinach, maple champagne mustard. roasted tomatoes and steamed broccoli.

toast with avocado, baby spinach, cherry tomatoes, sea salt.

fruit salad. 

marinated kale, onion, tomato, and pink peppercorn.

steel cut oats, banana, cranberries, cinnamon, and pure maple syrup.

steel cut oats, organic frozen mixed berries.

bread alone health bread toasted, earth balance,  local honey. 

lentil tacos in organic romaine leaves, daiya cheese, black beans, salsa, cabbage,  toffuti sour cream. 

roasted fennel and artichoke. 

maple roasted Brussels sprouts, orange slices, and red zinger tea. 

i love food. it's one of my favorite things. and eating is one of my favorite things to do. i love taking pictures and ever since i went to a plant based vegan diet i started noticing how pretty food is! the more untouched it remains, the better in photographs. so when i started taking pictures of food, i wondered, what exactly am i doing this for? but i realized, i love it! it is a little different than taking pictures of my kids running around or trying to get them to sit for a picture. i don't know the last time they did that! so, at least food cooperates. not only that, but food is very important to me. i view it like my medicine. the right food has the potential to save my life, and most certainly change my life. i cook a lot. we eat out too, but if i can make something at home, i would prefer it. my kids are great eaters. not everything goes over well, not even with Jonathan! Ha! but i keep trying none the less. 

so i am thinking of every friday, dedicating it to food. i'll post all the pictures i take of the stuff we eat all week. maybe you will try things too, or maybe it will change your mind that vegans don't have as much fun as carnivores. you will quickly see that we get more than a sufficient amount of vitamins and nutrients just by what we eat. so take a look... and get hungry!

(also, you will see steel cut oats, A LOT. we eat oatmeal almost everyday.) 

It's Your Day.

happy birthday beloved. it's your day. i am so looking forward to slipping away with you tonight to go to a fancy dinner,  to eat uninterrupted and to talk about all we're learning in this life. our conversations are so good, aren't they my love? i cherish you. every breathe and beat of your heart belongs to me. it's been hard work to get here, but darling,  it's so worth it. and i know you would say the same. i am blessed beyond any measure that i get to know you better than anyone else in this world will know you. God sees me fit for this. it makes me blush. i know you as my friend, and lover, helper, and leader. i know you and stand as your wife. and today it's your birthday darling, and i love you. and i like you. i feel a pull closer to you daily, a strength between us that is growing as we mature, and a romance and dance with our One and Only Jesus that will keep us as a union till the end. 

it was a pleasure to celebrate your life with the littles last night, and to be up early this morning with them as they sang in unison "happy birthday to you..." over the phone. we are doing this my love. we are. and i am pleased to a part of it. to watch the love of my life age, grow, and mature into the man that God knows he will become. and I, my darling, get to call myself your wife. 

let's keep aging together. let's keep letting life weather us, shape us, transform us, and teach us. and then at the end of the day lets tell each other about it. 

i love you. Happy Birthday, from your beloved. 

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Hello Jesus.

As i have come to understand death exchanged for life, paid for by Christ, will go something like this, from, dear God.... to.... Hello God. This morning my friend Toni met God as a reward for being faithful and dedicated to Him here on earth. Today she met Jesus. this morning i just kept whispering those words, hello Jesus.... i have let myself rest in those two soft, comforting, transforming words, "hello Jesus." this morning, perhaps that moment of released breath here, to an inhaled scent of Christ up there, is when she said it. Hello Jesus.

there is great promise that comes from the single act of resurrection of our Savior. for those who believe, they themselves are promised their own resurrection. and what could be more hopeful than that. but even Jesus took time to be alone, and weep. and we must allow ourselves that too. i am letting this soak in and marinate my heart, and in just another way Toni is impacting me and leading me closer to my sweet God.

this morning i took dune and lars to the river. my life in contrast to the mountains, the sun, the sky, the birds, the trees... what does it all mean? why is it all there? I pondered, i searched, i cried. i walked away with the answer... it's there. for me. it's there in the details that God says to me, "I am for you." it's there that i can keep fighting. it is there that Jesus romances me and wins my heart more and more each day. 

i ask that you pray for Toni's family, as they lost a truly remarkable part of their lives today. that they have peace that she is no longer fighting to live, but now fully alive.

with eyes closed, listen with your soul. and it's likely it will open up singing. 

Friday, January 20, 2012

Hearts Breaking.

Today i got the news that a dear friend and fellow Woman of Hope, has gone into hospice. hearing this makes me want to soak in the light of Christ, to sit at the feet of Jesus and stand in the truth that very soon, Christ will greet my friend and give her a new body. hearts are breaking, but Lord, You restore. You are there for those who mourn. 

Jesus, you have gotten my attention. Speak to me. 

1 Corinthians 15:51-57

         But let me tell you something wonderful, a mystery I'll probably never fully understand. We're not all going to die—but we are all going to be changed. You hear a blast to end all blasts from a trumpet, and in the time that you look up and blink your eyes—it's over. On signal from that trumpet from heaven, the dead will be up and out of their graves, beyond the reach of death, never to die again. At the same moment and in the same way, we'll all be changed. In the resurrection scheme of things, this has to happen: everything perishable taken off the shelves and replaced by the imperishable, this mortal replaced by the immortal. Then the saying will come true: 

   Death swallowed by triumphant Life!
   Who got the last word, oh, Death?
   Oh, Death, who's afraid of you now?
It was sin that made death so frightening and law-code guilt that gave sin its leverage, its destructive power. But now in a single victorious stroke of Life, all three—sin, guilt, death—are gone, the gift of our Master, Jesus Christ. Thank God!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

My Body.

Dear Graycen, Dune, and Lars,

     this is what i write to you about my body, your characteristics, the similarities, the warning, and the surrender of sorts. at times you may hear me talk of something i don't like or wish i could change about myself. on any given day this can be a battle to get my eyes off of myself and get them focused on my calling for Christ, the calling of which i respond to let God move my ground. you might even hear words so meaningless as this, "i don't like my nose," "i have nothing to wear," "i wish i could lose weight." i want you to know for the record that these are all lies. this is not of God. for God made me in His image and the likely hood is that He has given and equipped me with everything i need to serve Him fully, including my body. these are lies i hear in my head that get in the way of that. God did something when i had you three. He put little pieces of myself inside of you. things i would recognize, things that would help bond us, things that would help mothering you seem more like a love story. Graycen, in you i see my eyes. sweet darling, when we look at each other, there are moments when i am at a loss for words, for looking at you is like looking at myself. you are my first, and there is no mistake in God's designing of your spirit. Dune, although you are a twin, you were the next of my babies that i met, and when i saw you i melted a thousand times. you have my nose, my child, and my chin, and smile. we are, i believe, versions of each other. Lars, you are indeed my baby who everyone says, "he looks just like his father." but when i have you all to myself, and no one else is around, i see me somewhere in there. mostly, our hearts are what makes mine skip a beat. we are kindred. we are both so exposed. 

my beautiful children, may you know now, that God is telling me something. to love ourselves is a crucial step in the surrendering to the will of God. i pray daily that you accept yourself as part of a step in God's perfect plan for humanity. My prayer for His calling in your life grows deeper daily, that you respond to Him before the lies of the world. that you know your honor and value comes from being made in His image and are bought by His blood. that you don't fall victim to that of what the world wants you to become, just buying into another lie of false self image. know that your daddy and i hold you with high esteem and feel great honor in watching you grow. and know that what's familiar to me about you, and one day you'll see is familiar to you about me,  are the things of that which God has placed in us, they are the divine and perfect. 

Psalm 139:13-16 (MSG)

  Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out;
      you formed me in my mother's womb.
   I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking!
      Body and soul, I am marvelously made!
      I worship in adoration—what a creation!
   You know me inside and out,
      you know every bone in my body;
   You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
      how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
   Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
      all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
   The days of my life all prepared
      before I'd even lived one day.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

What Do I Do With What God's Given Me?

For Dune and Lars.

what do i do with what God's given me? you were no mistake you two, no mistake at all. your lives are a well thought out plan that fits somewhere between creation and Jesus's return. you have meaning and purpose and will grow from boys to stand tall as men. What do i do with what God's given me? should i pass the days complaining of the work it takes to pick up after  two rambunctious toddlers? should i worry that one day you won't listen to your mother's advice? should i think up good reasons to offer to people that question as to why i parent you both based on the principle of grace? or should i begin each day with my face pointed toward the sky, tears falling on either side of my cheeks, as i marvel at the fact that God has given you both to me. there are two hands, two ears, two eyes, two breasts, two shoulders that were and are there for both of you. i'm multi layered and double sided for you two. i am slow to anger and quick to respond, i am. i am in love with you both and there is enough for 12 lifetimes. you two are special and unique. i want you to know that i prayerfully seek leadership over your lives and as to how this fits into God's plan for you. i've been given a big job, i have. i've been given the job of taking you precious boys and leading you into well groomed, God fearing men, who will one day lead your families, raise your babies, point lost hearts toward the love of Jesus, and eventually come back home to thank your Mama. you boys are a miracle that i can not begin to wrap my head around, so when i am at a loss, i'll just wrap my arms. 

Monday, January 9, 2012

Times Square Fills Our Hearts.

we were so blessed by a visit with our friends last week! they were here from Florida and we met up with them one day in Times Square. we had so much fun. i mean, sooooo much fun! of course the hours felt like minutes and we suddenly found ourselves saying good bye. it did wonders to my little girls heart and spirit to visit with her friend Isabelle. and it did a number on her to have to hug her goodbye. but i can truly say i know the answer to the question-  is it better to have loved and lost or to have never loved at all? the answer is, it is always better to have loved. and we will see you again sweet friends! counting down for June. ;)
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