Thursday, August 15, 2013

Coney Island, Part Two.

so many good memories from last weekend. dune hanging at muscle beach? priceless. my favorite part of our whole trip was walking the boardwalk back to the car and the kids convincing us to let them go swimming in their clothes. when we said yes they literally took off, flinging their shoes in the sand and just ran right into the water. the smiles, the laughing, the sheer look of thrill on their little faces. the sky was that 6 pm brilliant bright casting sparkles all across the ocean. dune kept running up to me and giving me salty kisses and the more grossed out i acted, the harder he laughed. he kissed me a dozen times and every time i acted like it got worse and worse and he laughed more and more. i can see lars now running up to me, "mama, my pants are fallin' down!" and breaking out in hysterical laughter. and graycen gloriously throwing her body about in the waves as happy as a clam. guys, i don't know how i got here. i really don't. i know somewhere along the lines things were really hard and i was really sick and i was a single mother for a while, and it was a long season of pain and heartbreak. but sometime after that, it started to fade. those really hard days just seem to get further and further away. and one day i woke up and it was better than it ever was. better than i could have ever imagined.

i'm so thankful that when i was sick with cancer that God didn't decide to just do a little renovation on my life. i'm really so happy that He knew to just come in with a giant crane and tear the whole thing to smithereens. my heart rejoices in going forward in a godly marriage that refines me and defines me and that these little eyes and ears and hearts can grow in response to that. i thank God for giving me these years with them. i'll never not be thankful. for all of it.
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