Monday, March 16, 2015

An Update on Homeschooling.


  i feel it this time of year. a new birth, a rebirth, a revisiting of promises forgotten. while i sit on our back porch writing this, i can hear the whistle from the kettle on the stovetop. i can see the kids roaming through the back yard making paint from chalk and snow, found bird feathers as paint brushes, and imaginations that will take them to endless worlds without boundaries or restrictions and i humbly come before the throne of grace and thank God for this pull and craving for home that He placed in my heart some odd years ago. the beat and sound of our own way that He assured me was all part of His plan and not me going off the deep end. but I wonder to myself, "what if i had just said no?" what if i had believed it wasn't going to work, or what if i fell into the trappings of the voice constantly telling me i was beyond under qualified for this job of not only mothering, nurturing, and loving my children, but educating them as well. surely that was down right pompous to think i could do that all. but wildly and boldly i went running towards homeschooling like a dog to a bone and i grabbed it.



  the honeymoon wore off sometime around october and things started getting real. cold days were coming and the pace seemed to speed up. it was an unnerving combination for me, and through the process i learned how to say no to the unimportant. the winter came and served as a tool for me to get to know my kids, really get to know them. how do they learn, how do they see the world, what is their role in our family, in this journey? and in it all i met a new part of myself, the homeschooling mom. winter left us all a bit terrified of snow and cold days and all the time we spent indoors. there were far too many times that i would like to admit where we were just straight up on each others nerves. but in it i learned some things about dune. he is by far the most magnetically drawn child to others. he loves hard and well and forgives before you even finish asking for his forgiveness. he is fiercely in love with each one of his family members and his humor is like tonic on the coldest and hardest of days. he is funny and outgoing, loves to make up stories, and retains a lot of odd facts about history. it's sort of his thing. i have learned that lars is deep, deep in head and heart and you just can't play the same with him as you can with the others. he is sensitive and creative and probably has the highest IQ in the family. he is just so insanely smart that often times i wonder what will happen the day he realizes he has outsmarted me (which is coming!). he has a photographic memory and a very easy understanding of how things work. graycen has taught me the most though. and in our first year homeschool story, she holds a very special and specific place in my heart. she is the voice of reason and logical thinking when i find enormous amounts of doubt sneaking in. she is loving and kind, has an old fashioned heart, spends most her free time reading classics or being outdoors. she has devoted much of her time to her violin lessons and horseback riding and through it all has found herself. i enjoy her so much that i am constantly telling her that if she were someone else's daughter that i would really have to consider borrowing her for life;) i'm just so blessed by her and her sweet and kind spirit. her love for the Lord grows daily and one of the most exciting parts of this year has been watching her faith go from the one she has grown up on to the one she has made into her own. her love language is verbal and there have been parts of this year where she has sent words out into the air that i grab hold of like a life line.


     as i sit and write this, i feel the change in the air. spring is coming and one of the most convincing cases for homeschool is by far and large nature itself. we've been outside most days for the past week and i am being filled again with all the feelings that once called me to homeschooling. but with decisions to be made for this coming year i have to answer the question again. will i homeschool? while jonathan and i dive deep into prayer and try very hard to silence the noise of the world and others opinions, we ask God, where do you want our children? and this quote comes to mind while we consider, "Thought breeds thought; children familiar with great thoughts take as naturally to thinking for themselves as the well- nourished body takes to growing; and we must bear in mind that growth, physical, intellectual, moral, spiritual, is the sole end of education."- Charlotte Mason


 
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